Oh. My. God. How Self-Delusional IS The Right Wing!?

[filkertom]

The New York Times has The National Review's list of "Top 50 Conservative Rock Songs".

Number One With A Bullet: The Who's "Won't Get Fooled Again".

Go down the list. It's hysterically funny. If you don't get it, check out The Rude Pundit, Amanda Marcotte, and R. J. Eskow for detailed analyses. But, really, trying to pass off songs by The Who, The Rolling Stones, David Bowie, and "Revolution" by The Beatles as "conservative"... oy.

Okay, ma peeps -- give me a list of really conservative rock songs. First up on my hit parade: "Wishin' and Hopin'" by Dusty Springfield and "Weekend Warrior" by Ted Nugent.

Comments

[ericcoleman]

My favorite comment from the three links mentioned

"What number was Black Sabbaths War Pigs? "

That sizes it up perfectly

Head, meet desk. Repeat ad infinitum.

[eibii.livejournal.com]

Wow. It's like Born In The USA all over again. Irony? Sarcasm? Taking lines out of context? What the hell are those?

Aaaaagh gods no leave Rush the fuck out of this may they be impaled by Geddy Lee's protruding Adam's Apple dammit stoppit now aaaargh!

Okay, maybe not 'rock', but. Jermaine Stewart's "We Don't Have To Take Our Clothes Off To Have A Good Time". (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2v1lWQ2Bttc) Sadly ironic in its own sense, but at the same time - I got no problem with celibacy in itself, but drinking and dancing and partying all night can tend to lead to the sort of accidents that abstinence-only 'education' doesn't mention. Ahemhem.

Do they have to be good?

[solarbird]

"I Can't Drive 55" by Sammy Hagar
"Bush was Right" by The Right Brothers

Rambling, part two.

[eibii.livejournal.com]

Is there a chance this article was meant as a joke? Maybe they meant to get the Conservatives who bought it to go out, listen to the music, and be deeply offended by what they thought was something comfy and welcoming? I mean, Blink 182? LIVING COLOUR?! Rime of the Ancient Mariner?!

... Yeah, probably not. Oh, well.

Fun fact - I'm actually watching Bob Roberts (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0103850/) as I'm trying to read this. It's funny, but it hurts.

[shsilver.livejournal.com]

It would seem to prove the point that conservatives don't understand irony or sarcasm. The Kinks, of course, have always been considered a conservative band, especially in the 60s when they were banned from playing in the US.

[youngcurmudgeon.livejournal.com]

Conservative rock song? How about Wild Thing? Only three chords!

[eibii.livejournal.com]

*ba dum bum!*

[ericcoleman]

They were banned in the US because they were drunken louts who acted like idiots to officials in the music union

[filkerdave.livejournal.com]

Heh..the only super serious one I could think of right away is already on that list -- The Cranberries' The Icicle Melts.

[archanglrobriel.livejournal.com]

Well lord, while they're at it, why not include...

"I will survive" Gloria Gaynor (talks about Survival... after a hostile Democratic presidency maybe?)
"YMCA" by the Village People (Young Mens CHRISTIAN Association...what could be more wholesome?)
"I am what I am" from The Birdcage (a glorious celebration of all your Non-PC traits..no matter what "they" say)


Really, when cluelessness becomes a High Art Form I say we should at least have some fun with it...

[ldwheeler.livejournal.com]

Holy. Flaming. Papayas.

Bet they never spun "Revolution No. 9" ...

If I didn't know better, I'd think this list was a parody, a wickedly clever Onion piece or somesuch. What really cracks me up is the dissertation about "Janie's Got a Gun": "How the right to bear arms can protect women from sexual predators." And concluding that the "tyrant's face is red" in "Battle of Evermore" has to be about the Soviet Union. Hey, Mordor, Moscow ... same vowels and vowel placement and everything ... :-)

Seriously, the values expressed in many of these songs are hardly exclusive to conservatism ... or liberalism, or any ideology. They're human values: love; freedom; independence, responsibility. But since the Right tends to leap to the conclusion that human values are ipso facto conservative values, I can see how they might leap to that conclusion. Still, the National Review crowd are no dummies, so there's probably a lot more disingeniousness going on here than honest ignorance. If it were honest ignorance, they'd have stuck "Born in the U.S.A." in there just like Reagan did -- it's kinda flag-wavin' and all, if you don't listen to those pesky verses ...

Sigh. This was hysterically funny.

Real conservative rock songs? Hmmm. None come to mind right now. Another problem is that most people aren't solidly red or blue, to use the tired metaphor -- we have opinions on various issues that may put us in the "conservative" camp sometimes and the "liberal" in others. I don't think anyone would ever call Bob Dylan a right-winger, but NR was right about "Neighborhood Bully": I always did view that song as a somewhat clumsy (considering the author) defense of the nation of Israel -- which isn't necessarily a "conservative" opinion but one which most conservatives hold.

[brithistorian.livejournal.com]

This is right up there with Ole Miss using the fact that they were mentioned in Billy Joel's "We Didn't Start the Fire" in their recruiting brochures.

[solarbird]

You're shitting me. Please god.

[brithistorian.livejournal.com]

I wish were. This was circa 1990; I'm pretty sure they've fixed it since then.

[ericthemage.livejournal.com]

Samhain - All Murder All Guts All Fun

[holzman.livejournal.com]

These explanations about how these songs are conservative remind me of those explanations back in the day about how those songs were satanic.

[admnaismith.livejournal.com]

The Congressman from New Jersey who sang "Twinkle Twinkle Kenneth Starr/Now we know how great you are" on the House floor.

[trdsf.livejournal.com]

What, they couldn't be bothered to spin "Teach Your Children" into a prescient cry of support for 'No Child Left Behind' and school vouchers? Sheesh.

[filkertom.livejournal.com]

Got an excellent list in e-mail from Jon Swift (http://jonswift.blogspot.com/2006/05/50-more-conservative-rock-songs.html).

[unclelumpy.livejournal.com]

It would seem to prove the point that conservatives don't understand irony or sarcasm.

See my icon.

[salkryn.livejournal.com]

Perhaps They Might be Giants' "You're Not the Boss of Me Now?" It makes about as much sense as any of the others we've seen. "You're not the boss of me now and you're not so big" is obviously about small government, right?