Happy Birthday, Baron Munchausen

[filkertom]

On this date in 1720.

So let's make it Tall Tales Day. Start, or continue, a Tall Tale. For instance (ahem), I understand that one of you out there managed to win a Royal Cooking Competition using only three eggs, some Clancy's Fancy Hot Sauce, and an electric toothbrush...?

Comments

[sazettel.livejournal.com]

Well, there was the thing that happened at the Halloween party, but I've never really told anybody about that, and I'm not sure I should...

yep

[tinkerbell1980.livejournal.com]

you should tast it
minty ;)

[jcw-da-dmg.livejournal.com]

Well, naturally, one's cooking equipment is very important. That and the fact that one uses Buffalo Eggs [tm].

[joshbrown.livejournal.com]

Well, you see, milord, it all started about a week before the actual Royal Cooking Competition was held.
I was sitting at home one day, preparing some crème brûlée as a snack, when there came a knock on the door.
I wasn't expecting anyone at the time, but I was at a point in my cooking where I could go to the door and see who it was.
Why, it was none other than my old friend Gustav Gustavsson, who I knew was usually found in the Arctic Circle at this time of year.
"Why, Gustav, what so ever are you doing here?"

[fair-witness.livejournal.com]

Suddenly, a shot rang out!

[jss]

The maid screamed!

[filkertom.livejournal.com]

I wet 'em.

[fair-witness.livejournal.com]

And the little small little small little girl with the tattered shawl?

[markbernstein.livejournal.com]

She missed. As she reloaded, the pirates advanced on the blind man . . .

[fair-witness.livejournal.com]

There was a great thundering in the air, as a thousand elephants stampeded towards the pirates.

[palenoue.livejournal.com]

And then I died.

Fourth time I died that year. I heartily recommend it to everyone, a wonderful way to refresh your humors and clear your sinuses.

[maiac.livejournal.com]

I'm not dead now, I was only spending the year dead for tax purposes. With the big tax refund I got, I bought a ship. It was a bargain, because the used ship dealer told me it had been owned by a little old pirate who only sailed it on Sundays. The pirate's name was Bluelaw, or something like that, I think.

[alwosm.livejournal.com]

... and we sailed to an Unknown and unremarked island, the Island of the Dead. Having done battle and showing my mettle versus the Dead King's warriors, he granted me a boon ... and then I woke up

[filkertom.livejournal.com]

AND I WAS STILL ON THE ISLAND OF THE DEAD!!!

[drzarron.livejournal.com]

Not unlike the time I shot an elephant in my pajamas... how he got in my pajamas I'll never know..

God Bless You, Groucho, wherever you are!

[rook543.livejournal.com]

It wasn't that hard really.

You pour the sauce into a bowl and provide a spoon.

you throw your eggs at your competitors, blinding them...

And you put the electric toothbrush at the judges throat, and 'persuade' him as to why you should win...reminding him that an electric toothbrush is the LEAST dangerous thing in a chefs toolbox!

[kestrels-nest.livejournal.com]

No, no, no. You beat the eggs into the hot sauce with the toothbrush to make a spicy custard, which you then feed to the judges. When they wave their hands in the air, beckoning unto the water-boy, why it is clear they are unanimously acclaiming you the winner!

[archiver-tim.livejournal.com]

Just be sure to add some devo spice.

[jss]

Is it cinnamon-sweet?

[valkyrwench.livejournal.com]

It was a Waterpik, darling, not an electric toothbrush.

[selenesue.livejournal.com]

No shit, there we were, nine against a thousand....

[30,000 words deleted]

And those were the toughest nine guys we ever met!

/rimshot

Jaw drops

[kathy-the-geek.livejournal.com]

I share a FREAKIN' Birthday with BARON MUNCHAUSEN?

That's not a tall tale...It's true...and weird...

Re: Jaw drops

[filkertom.livejournal.com]

And that's a Happy Birthday for Kathy! :)

Re: Jaw drops

[kathy-the-geek.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

[wildcard9.livejournal.com]

It was a dark and stormy night. Suddenly, a shot rang out!
A door slammed. The maid screamed. Suddenly, a pirate ship appeared on the horizon!

(If I'm going to steal, I will steal from the best!)

*dons top hat and false nose*

[smallship1.livejournal.com]

Without doubt the most remarkable man of my acquaintance was Devereaux Cheesebaum. One morning in 1921 he set out to obtain a daily periodical from the genial reprobate whose emporium stood not twenty yards from his front door. Well, sir...

Re: *dons top hat and false nose*

[filkertom.livejournal.com]

... the emporium had been replaced with the most picturesque little photographic shop. People would put on costuming, or pose behind painted boards with holes for their faces to peek through, and get a clever picture for only two shillings.

Where the previous establishment had gone was not evident. But that wasn't the interesting part....

Re: *dons top hat and false nose*

[shadowe.livejournal.com]

what they were all unaware of is that those lovely pictures would age right along with their real lives...

[batyatoon]

I am reminded of my favorite college prank ever, when four of us set out to unhook the Statue of Liberty and turn it around....

[acelightning.livejournal.com]

[tomreedtoon.livejournal.com]

Sounds like you worked as an intern for a "morning zoo" show. There's a show in Orlando (on XM radio too) called "The Monsters of the Morning." Last week they sent out three interns, lead by Drunky the Bear (his real air name!) to capture a gator before the Sheriff's Department and a qualified animal trapper could.

There's also "Fatties at the Fair" where they take fat women, stuff them full of carnival food, and make them ride violent rides at the fairgrounds, and the last one to throw up wins.

So yes, acelightning, I totally believe you.

[acelightning.livejournal.com]