Dreams Of Noise

Dictates like these get me thinking that perhaps the problem is that ultra-conservatives aren't getting laid nearly often enough.

This brings icky mental images into my head.

But is there really any other reason why they'd be so obsessed with making sure the rest of us aren't getting any, or seeing any, or even THINKING about the subject? Other than sheer jealousy, I mean.

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batyatoon

Because they think it's wrong. Because they've been taught it's wrong, and they've internalized it.

There's no reason to assume jealousy, or a lack of sufficient sex in their own lives. It's just that simple. They think it's wrong.

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Indeed. There is a vast quantity of history and cultural indoctrination to overcome -- literally hundreds of years of thinking that anything that distracted you from thoughts of God was evil. There's a whole lot of guilt and shame mixed in there as well.

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Dratted sar-chasm . . .

Mind the gap. I HAD meant that to come across as pithy and sarcastic, but it sounded a lot funnier in my head.

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batyatoon

I might have caught that if it hadn't been for the fact that Morford seems to think quite sincerely that it's all about the conservatives' own sexual repression/dysfunction. And that if they'd all just get laid more, they wouldn't be so obsessed with running our sex lives.

Which is ... about as useful as a serial killer insisting that if we'd all just loosen up and experience the fun of murdering people and eating their brains, we wouldn't have all these uptight rules against it.
Unnecessary disclaimer: I am not actually equating murdering people and eating their brains with having premarital sex.

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Heh. Gotcha. I would by lying if I said I never corrected someone for joking about a pet peeve of mine.

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batyatoon

(I'm a bit embarrassed that I truly didn't get you were joking. I do have a sense of humor! Honest I do!)

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Well, then, we're even. I'm embarrassed to be taken seriously for saying something so dumb. ^ v ^

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Mmmm... zombie Singles' Night.

Good Ghu, that may be a song. :)

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batyatoon

... Really?

I would be delighted. And appreciative. Very appreciative. There could be cookies.

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markbernstein.livejournal.com

< a href="http://www.voltaire.net/">Voltaire has a rather disgusting song called "Zombie Prostitute".

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thatcrazycajun.livejournal.com

"The most preposterous notion that homo sapiens has ever dreamed up is that the Lord God of Creation, Shaper and Ruler of all the Universes, wants the saccharine adoration of His creatures, can be swayed by their prayers, and becomes petulant if He does not recieve this flattery. Yet this absurd fantasy, without a shred of evidence to bolster it, pays all the expenses of the oldest, largest, and least productive industry in all history.

"The second most preposterous notion is that copulation is inherently sinful."
- Lazarus Long, "Time Enough for Love", by Robert Heinlein

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wolfger.livejournal.com

Amen.

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lothie.livejournal.com

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAWTF?????????!!!!!!!!!!!11

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unclelumpy.livejournal.com

It'd be funny if it weren't so pathetic.
...
...
...
Ah, what the Hell? I'll laugh anyway!

HAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!

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redaxe.livejournal.com

And to think, this means we're not seeing any federal funds for Global Orgasm Day (caveat: site plays unrequested music) :-)

[Ed. note: I'm not at all convinced that there's any benefit to G.O.D. -- but I bet it's about a million orders of magnitude healthier than the crap Morford talks about.]

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As Allan Sherman said, "Orgasm, even when it's bad, is pretty good."

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This (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Allan_Sherman) Allan Sherman? He said that?

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Ahhhh. Thou hast never read The Rape of the A*P*E. Yeah, that Allan Sherman, who wrote one of the best, funniest, and most heartfelt manifestos on being a human in general and the American sexual revolution in particular. It's also the book where he came up with the Seven Pleasures, which I think do sum things up nicely: Eat, Drink, Shit, Piss, Sleep, Fuck, Play.

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I have not. I merely listened to most of his records as a child, because my father owned them and they were funny.

I'm going to have to track that down.

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redaxe.livejournal.com

Beats the hell out of card games! :-)

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pickledcritter.livejournal.com

If you read the linked USA Today article, you'll note this is in specific reaction to the report released last week showing that single/unwed motherhood is up dramatically - and NOT via teenage pregnancy, but by adult women 19-29. The administration does NOT like that, as it must mean that *gasp* ADULTS who know exactly what they are doing are having sex outside of marriage, and we know this must not be allowed!

Doesn't anyone up there know that there's an increased risk for pregnancies over the age of 35 (http://www.webmd.com/content/article/51/40823.htm) along with an increased risk for getting diabetes and high blood pressure in pregnancies over the age of 30. I guess this means that essentially the "pro-lifers" would rather the woman have a medium- or high-risk pregnancy, potentially endangering the mother AND the child rather than have sex (and subsequent children :) ) during their PRIME childbearing years. Bit of a contradiction, there huh?

Can anyone else here can see how short a step it can be from pushing this to a trying to establish a full-blown eugenics program? They obviously want (and have always wanted, really) to control what goes on in the bedroom. Ostensibly it's because it's "immoral" or "sinful" or "not good for the child" or whatever, but (at least at the top level) I'm not so sure any of those are the real reasons - and trying to control who does what with who (and the subsequent progeny) would be the next logical step...

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wolfger.livejournal.com

Doesn't anyone up there know that there's an increased risk for pregnancies over the age of 35 along with an increased risk for getting diabetes and high blood pressure in pregnancies over the age of 30.

What? You been listnin' to dem dadgum signtists again? That's just a bunch of nonsense, like global warming and evil-lution.

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neadods.livejournal.com

I don't usually blogwhore in your space, but please see my latest post, because it's got all the links on the subject of abstinence. Not only the "just because you're an adult doesn't mean you get to make THOSE kind of decisions!" abstinence linked to above, but a Republican Congresscritter going on record saying "Uh, that abstinence thing for HIV in Africa? Not only not working, but making everyone's jobs harder, so we have to knock it off" and the media flurry - in England, because we don't talk about such things - about the study that shows that using condoms properly drops the teen birthrate at a quantumly-higher rate than abstinence.

The abstinence people want us all to keep our knees together and be ignorant... but people will keep doing those pesky scientific studies and comparisons...

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Slightly random note, but it's interesting to note that Chimpy's dad was 22 and mom was 21 when Chimpy was born. One has to wonder how different things might have been if they'd waited.

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redaxe.livejournal.com

Yeah. Good idea. Till, say, forever. :-)

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I'm not one for meddling with the time stream, normally, but that sounds like a good reason to fire up the ol' time machine. Or at least call in the Chrono Guard.

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Not random at all. Remember? IOKIYAR.

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Except I'm not. I have this pesky thing called a mind that prevents me from blindly following idiots off the edge of a cliff. ~_^

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No, no. :) My point was that it's okay for them to do it, see, 'cause they're on The Correct Team. But normal shlubs like us, nah, we're moral cripples and have to be shown the Light.

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Ah, ok, now I understand.:)
*shudders* If ever I can be considered normal by the Shrub's standards, I hope someone puts me out of my misery.

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selenesue.livejournal.com

Epidemiologically speaking, all STD's could be wiped out within a generation if we could control our sex urges. Millenia of evolution of humans and germs have proven that this won't happen. Their kind of thinking is just bad sociology as well as bad medicine. Not even the most rabid control freaks can control everything. Every time they make a bad decision, Mother Nature will just laugh and bring on a new virus or a hurricane, SURPRISE!

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tigertoy.livejournal.com

I'm sorry. It's not funny, it's pathetically stupid. It's fine to laugh at a stupid idea when it's something new that someone is testing out, but when it's the core of government policy, you need to take it deadly seriously. Making an idea a joke is a good way to stop people from adopting it in the first place, but once they're committed to it, it makes them angry and defensive and less willing than ever to recognize that it was a mistake.

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It's funny because it's pathetically stupid. They actually think there's a snowball's chance in the Bahamas that they can convince people to Just Not Have Sex. We don't have to "make it a joke" -- it's a joke from the start, and yet another example of how BushCo has no connection to reality.

So, you're thinking that once they start trying to enforce it it's not going to be funny anymore? Maybe, if only because I guarantee to you nothing will start an armed revolution quicker than telling people it's against the law to fuck.

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tigertoy.livejournal.com

It's not a joke. Just because people won't actually follow their doctrine doesn't mean that basing policy on it is harmless. When they conflate any real sex education with the message that what they really want you to learn is to not do it, they make people tune out on all of the information, even the parts that they would be much better off following that they'd be willing to follow if it weren't lost in the stupid. Not talking about condoms because abstinence is better is the kind of stupid we call laughable, but it's not funny because it's not harmless. Kind of like basing our Iraq plans on the assumption that we'd be welcomed with flowers was laughably stupid, except that they actually DID it and look where we are now. Just because a plan has no chance of achieving the intended effect does not mean it won't have any effects at all.

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Slight difference -- in that case, they actually had, y'know, control of the military and things like that. In this case, they have to preach ignoring one of the single most powerful instincts the species has, one person at a time. And, honestly, if that's what they're advocating, why should anyone take them seriously about anything? Their information is shoddy. They are out of touch with reality. And people will get information from more reliable and realistic sources, or not, and you can't do anything about that except get the current regime out of power. Which we are trying to do.

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mstrhypno.livejournal.com

They are not Neo-Cons, they are Neo-Con Artists!

But worse, they have now PROVEN that they have NOT honored the separation of Church and State with this "doctrine," but have, instead, tried to instigate a new religious force into the American Way of Life - Neo-Shakerism!

That's right, My Fellow Americans - Thou Shall Not Screw (that's for the Government to do FOR you and TO you!) until you are over 30 (which puts you at SIGNIFICANTLY higher risk of having children who will have birth defects, learning disabilities and who will have parents in their 50's when they hit COLLEGE - IF they LIVE that long! (Pass the duct tape and sheet plastic, please!)

Surprise, surprise, Sergeant Carter! Ol' Gomer Bush has gone and done it agin!

He's proven that cousins should NOT marry, that religious idealogues should not make public policy speeches and public policy on our pubes!

What next? Mandatory salt peter in every pot?

I wouldn't put it past him!

"Land of the Free," my ass. It's becoming the "Land of Do What They Tell Us To Do and Don't Ask Questions About It - Because, If You Do, You'll Wind Up In GitMo!"

Sarcastic-Lee

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Except the Shakers didn't try to force their belief system on the entire country.

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mstrhypno.livejournal.com

I know! That's WHY they are Neo-CON ARTISTS! They are trying to pass this pseudo-Shakerism off as being "in the national interest!"

If that isn't a con (in every sense of the word!), then I don't know WHAT is - and, as a professional magician, I am pretty sure that I am familiar enough with the long con, the short con and the REPUBLI-CON to be able to call one when I see one!

;)

Lee

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