Judgment Day's A-Comin'

[filkertom]

Supposedly, this Saturday is the Rapture.

The Righteous -- approximately 3% of the world's population -- will be swept up into Heaven. The rest of humanity will suffer through five months of really severe weather before God destroys the universe on October 21.

The first question, of course, is are you ready?

Rapture fans, Are You RRRRRRRRRRRRReady???

The second question is troubling to agnostics and atheists such as myself. What if it actually happens?

What if Harold Camping got the date right, but the faith wrong? What if the Muslims are taken to Heaven, or the Buddhists, or Hamas, or whatever's left of the Manson Family, or Al-Qaida, or the Southern Baptists, or the Pagani, or the atheists!?!?!? (That last one presumes that life is a test of reasoning through evidence.)

Most important of all: What are your plans for Sunday?

Comments

[louisadkins]

Also, how will you tell?

Ooh! Can we get a pagan rapture, instead?
*All* the hateful, bigoted assholes in the world drug off to somewhere else by their god/dess, leaving the planet to the people who still care about it and those who live on it?

[filkertom]

I'm sure it will be possible to tell. By sheer statistics, three people out of every hundred will suddenly vanish, or ascend to Heaven, or burst into flame, or something. I'm sure enough of them will do so in public areas that we'd notice.

And, pagan rapture? I'm in.

Well...

[ysabetwordsmith]

The weather forecast keeps waffling between rain or no rain for Sunday. If the weather's nice, I'll be outside yardening for part of the day. If it rains, I'll probably be inside writing as usual. If it raptures, I and my sword will have a discussion with The Management about how poorly this planet, the human race, and religion have been managed in recent millennia.

Re: Well...

[filkertom]

Hee hee. And I'll be way over here on this side of the room with a bowl of popcorn.

[technoshaman.livejournal.com]

I was endowed by that which Created me with Brains. I figure if She is going to get upset with me for using them and arriving at where I'm at, I want no part of it.

Sunday? Probably involving motorcycles. Or maybe moving plans.

[his-spiffyness.livejournal.com]

Well, it better not happen before Doctor Who, or I will be very crosss with Jesus.

[ruisseau.livejournal.com]

I want to "like" this so badly! :D

[smallship1.livejournal.com]

So if you're swept up into a place whose existence your reason and the evidence you've gathered has led you strenuously to deny all your life, that means you've passed a test of reasoning through evidence?

Well, that kind of perversity would certainly fit with the apple story...

[catsittingstill.livejournal.com]

Well, given that the evidence would have to have been thoroughly doctored by God to remove every trace of His presence, yeah, sure.

Why He would want to do such a thing... elaborate practical joke, maybe?

[eustaciavye.livejournal.com]

SUnday I plan to sleep in while my roommate goes to (non-crazy) church. When she gets home we will try to figure out what to make fun of now that we can't make as many stupid "rapture on saturday, excellent no need to pay the rent" jokes.

[alverant.livejournal.com]

Actually we'll find out on Friday if it's true or not because the quakes are suppose to start on the international date line at 6 so those of us in the states will get the news while it's still the day before. But I don't think the followers will get this so the guy running the same has an extra day to get ahead of the angry mob.

My parents are visiting relatives this weekend so they'll get hit an hour before I do if it happens. The Dupage SF party is on Saturday. Circumstances prevented me from going these past 2 months so I do plan to go this time. I think there is something Sunday, but I forget.

Bad news is that it's likely my contract job will be up on next Friday. Everyone says I did a great job and I should be proud of it. Which I am, but I didn't think I'd like working there so much. This was one of those jobs that I could see myself staying for a while. Well until we ran out of projects for me to do. And at the rate I was doing them, it would have happened soon anyway. :)

So now I get to look forward to the job hunt grind a few weeks before DucKon. First order of business, take a vacation. When you don't have PTO, you can't take a day off (well you can, but it costs ya). Give myself a break before getting back into the swing of things. Then try to find a job that's an easy drive away.

[valarltd.livejournal.com]

Awesome, I'm going to DucKon too! Look for me? Angelia Sparrow. I have several panels on the writing track, and will be in the dealer's room with the Literary Underworld.

[awfulhorrid.livejournal.com]

I will be recovering from Saturday night's outing to a burlesque show in Milwaukee with three of my girlfriends, two of whom are also dating, and the husband of one of the girlfriends.

(At least one other friend will be joining us, but I like specifying this particular grouping since it would probably cause people like Mr. Camper to have at least minor conniptions.)

[jannyblue.livejournal.com]

Actually, I have no plans for this Sunday...

But it's just a coincidence, I assure you. :-)

[ruisseau.livejournal.com]

My husband and I are running a forum at our pagan UU church about the UU General Assembly and probably sleeping in. It's an exciting life!

[nimitzbrood.livejournal.com]

Well...if it happens...I'll happily be one of the "meek" that inherit the earth. ;-)

[ladysmith.livejournal.com]

I'm doing my first 5K walk with Weight Watchers. Then coming home and crashing because the walk is at 7 ACK-emma. ;-)

[ericcoleman]

Hmmm, Lizzie is in Chicago this weekend, so I'll probably sleep late.

[melchar.livejournal.com]

I'm going to be playing D&D on Saturday, followed by a nice dinner. Sunday will likely be me playing 'Civilization III' &/or 'City of Heroes' online, with perhaps spareribs for dinner.

[virtualvirtue.livejournal.com]

Sunday - going to church where I'd never heard of something like this "we know exactly what day this is going to happen" thing...

Rest of the weekend is going to be full of chores and fun.

[valarltd.livejournal.com]

Sunday? same as every other Sunday.
Laundry. Grocery shopping. Making love to my husband. Writing.

Jesus and I broke up a long time ago and started seeing other people. (Seems Hermes has a crush on me right now) I doubt he'll be taking me home to Daddy at this late date.

[stormsdotter.livejournal.com]

I broke up with Jesus because I couldn't swallow Turning the Other Cheek. Also, his fan club drives me crazy.

Thor and I have a much better relationship.

...though I admit after seeing the movie adaptation of Thor, if I saw Movie-Thor and Movie-Loki in a bar, I'd decide Thor was out of my league in a second and spend the evening chatting with Loki.

[stormsdotter.livejournal.com]

I'll be LARPing this weekend.

...ironically, I stopped being friends with the Born-Again Christians becuase they accused me of "Satan Worship" for LARPing and reading Fantasy.

[joshuwain.livejournal.com]

And I'll be refereeing my Pathfinder tabletop RPG.

I hope the Rapture comes after the dinner break. I'd hate to have to witness all that on an empty stomach.

(Can I make a saving throw versus Rapture? Or would that be "disbelief"?)

Yours,
Sylvan (Dave)

[palenoue.livejournal.com]

Two things I'd like to see:

1) All the religious nuts ascend to their vaguely-defined and not at all thought out heavens, leaving the rest of us here to inherit the earth and progress without any of their inanities interfering. Just think, we could teach biology in schools without fear of creationists attacking science.

2) All the atheists, agnostics and tolerant religious types ascend to a big spiritual MMO in the sky while those of arrogant faith remain here for the end times.

Also, gotta tell you this. Been reading Doonesbury? That really happened! Long story, but the short version is an undercover lesbian stumbled upon a "True Believer®" as he fretted over how his material goods might impede his ascension to the Feast of Jesus. With just a few suggestions she walked away with two cars, a mobile home, a boat, five expensive TVs, and numerous other things. The rapture didn't happen so she sold everything to finance law college where she graduated then moved back to the midwest to start her civil rights practice.

Miracles _do_ happen! Hallelujah!

[alverant.livejournal.com]

Miracles happen when people DO things! Great for her!

[mtgat]

I think I'll be leading a rousing chorus of "Come the Rapture (Can I Have Your Car?)"

[batyatoon]

Hey, not just agnostics and atheists. *waves*

If it actually happens, I'm going to be down here on the ground yelling at God to quit messing with us.

[catsittingstill.livejournal.com]

Shhh! You don't want Him to put all the fundagelicals back do you? Let's just tiptoe quietly off to the park, that's the ticket...

[sffilk.livejournal.com]

Unless my sister straightens it out, I'll be taking my nephew and his girlfriend to the Georgia Renaissance Festival on Sunday. If it gets straightened out, I'll probably head to Costco and Super H Mart while inbetween I'll listen to PHC.

[redneckgaijin.livejournal.com]

What I want is, on Monday, for flash mobs to show up at every radio station run by FamilyRadio.org, the pinheads perpetuating this thing, point at the station, and do the Nelson laugh in unison.

[sunfell.livejournal.com]

There's a Family Radio building down the street from my house. There's a giant For Sale sign in front of it.

I want to know if it'll go for pennies.

[tcgtrf.livejournal.com]

It's not the end of the Universe as rumored. The server is just due for unscheduled downtime while several important fixes are implemented. These fixes include, but are not limited to:

1. Earth's inhabitants are currently unable to see any signals originating outside of their solar system.

2. Spiral galaxies are rotating as if they're DVDs, rather than like solar systems do.

3. Mass of universe is too low by a factor of 100 to close it.

4. Fossils appear to be more than 6000 years old.

5. Numerous flaws in character generation software.

The server downtime is expected to last three hours, but may last longer. All characters will get a life extension equal to the final duration of the downtime.

Around 200 million characters have been created with flaws in their avatar from the bugged software. Those flawed (and in some cases exploitable) characters will be deleted, but players will be allowed to reroll new ones at no charge. We regret any inconvenience this may cause (and no, you can't keep your stuff).

Full patch notes will be available after server reset.

Any rumor of the Universe MMO going out of business is unfounded--the Elohim and I intend to continue providing all of you with the best in gaming enjoyment for the forseeable future.

God--Chief Programmer

[sunfell.livejournal.com]

This is so full of win, it's not even funny.

You win the internet. Here- have several!

[sunfell.livejournal.com]

I'll be doing normal stuff, but will be tuning into to Colbert, Leno, Stewart and the other comedy sources for the post-game show.

:-)

[his-spiffyness.livejournal.com]

What I don't get is why Premilennial Dispensationalism is so popular in Christianity. At the heart of it's saying the world sucks and things are not going to get any better, no matter what you do. All you can really do is hope and pray that Jesus comes back and takes you away from all of this.

It's religion without hope.