Dreams Of Noise

I liked Jim Nabors when I was a kid -- watched him on The Andy Griffith Show, and then when he spun off into the equally popular Gomer Pyle, U.S.M.C. Then one day we got to hear him sing, and whoa. Bumpkin face, opera voice.

Not that I'd thought much about him in the ensuing decades. He'd kinda dropped off my radar. Well, that certainly changed today:

Jim Nabors, the Hawaii resident well known for his starring role in the 1960s television sitcom "Gomer Pyle, USMC," married his longtime male partner early this month, he told Hawaii News Now Tuesday.

Nabors, 82, said he married his companion of 38 years, Stan Cadwallader, who's 64, in Seattle on Jan. 15.

[...]

"I'm 82 and he's in his 60s and so we've been together for 38 years and I'm not ashamed of people knowing, it's just that it was such a personal thing, I didn't tell anybody," Nabors said. "I'm very happy that I've had a partner of 38 years and I feel very blessed. And, what can I tell you, I'm just very happy."

I'm very happy as well. Dude's spent his life entertaining people, and half of it in the company of one devoted companion.

And, I can't help it: the mercenary, politically-minded side of me thinks the timing is perfect. Nabors is a lesser American icon, pretty much beloved by everybody, without a mean bone in his body... and now he is finally, legally wed to his long-time partner. Who's mean or crabby or obsessed enough to object? What the hell are people going to say against Gomer Pyle? Does this invalidate all the gospel records he recorded?

Go get 'em, Jim. And much happiness to you and Stan.

All 1.3 million square feet of it. For more information, visit http://www.aidsquilt.org/.

Phenomenal.

Some people are just twisted:

Sean Harris, the Senior Pastor of Berean Baptist Church in Fayetteville, North Carolina, has some words of advice for parents of possibly LGBT children: Smack them around. Beat the gay out of them. Or, in his precise words, "Give [him] a good punch!"

I followed the link in the dKos story, and listened to the audio of this yokel, this hayseed, this fucking jerk, specifically say that not only should you smack around your kids if they don't conform to your vision of what a boy or a girl should be like, he gives you "special dispensation" to do so. I'm pretty damn certain Child Protective Services and the Police Department would be quite interested in his legal authority to do so.

He would, of course, claim some sort of "moral" authority.

Except nobody -- nobody -- has the "moral authority" to punch a child. Let alone the "moral authority" to authorize others to do it.

This guy is scum.

ETA: There's a new link at the dKos story. Pastor Sean has responded, saying -- can you guess? -- he was "taken out of context" and everyone is "misquoting" him. He goes on to say that he and his followers must be "tolerably intolerant" of the LBGT community, and then details what I presume is the Acceptable Level of Disciplining Children:

... At times this may include appropriate and reasonable physical means (Prov. 10:13) employed upon the fleshy portion of the child's buttocks (Prov. 22:15; 23:13); that this method is to be viewed as correction rather than punishment (Prov. 23:13); and that this correction will result in the child's physical and spiritual betterment (Prov. 23:14). We believe a parent should correct his child with other means as well, but that they should-as led by the Holy Spirit-model the chastening of God the Father (Prov. 3:11-12) Who corrects all of His children out of love (2 Sam 7:14; Prov. 3:12; Heb 12:6; Rev 3:19) and forgives them by virtue of His Son's redemptive work on the cross (1 Pet. 3:18). The Father does this to develop His child's reverence for Himself (Heb. 12:9) and likeness to His Son Jesus Christ (Rom 8:29; Heb 12:11)....

Don't you just love that phrasing? "Employed upon the fleshy portion of the child's buttocks". I'm goin' to Hell just for reading that.

I don't even want to get into the Scripture quoted here. Suffice it to say, I won't be attending Pastor Sean's church anytime in the remaining lifespan of this universe, and I really think someone from CPS should check him out.

Inevitable, inexorable, the right thing to do.

I love my home state of Michigan. By and large, it's a lovely place. But our political system -- city, county, and state -- has gone down the effing tubes.

Brand-spankin'-new law. Hmmm. Maybe I shouldn't word it that way. Basically, it's a law with the ostensible purpose of providing more tangible protections against bullies and bullying. Y'know, like kids being beaten up by other kids.

Thing is, it's got loopholes.

The law includes a section noting it doesn't abridge First Amendment free speech rights or prohibit expression of religious or moral viewpoints — a provision Democrats fear could be used to justify harassment of gay, lesbian or transgender students.

It's worth it to follow some of the other links, including Joe My God and the straightforward Detroit News story.

Here's the thing: THERE ARE NO EXCUSES, EVER, FOR BULLYING.

You're worried about infringing on the rights of someone who is trying to harass, intimidate, threaten, and possibly physically harm someone? Fuck you. The old "your right to throw a punch ends at the tip of my nose" bit.

You say that there should be an exemption for those expressing their religious beliefs? Fuck you. We can play that game. Someone's First Amendment right to bully Someone Else because their faith "demands" it is cancelled out by Someone Else's First Amendment right protecting them from the government supporting any specific religion. Not to mention, y'know, the laws against assault. Oh, and, let's look at the tax status of any religion that says Thou Shalt Beat People Up Because They Make Us Feel All Squicky.

This is not merely a bad law, it's an asinine law. It literally provides a blueprint for how to get out of an accusation of bullying -- I Was Expressing My First Amendment Rights.

It's yet another of many, many examples of just how screwed up the people in charge really are.

I'm nowhere near ready to leave Michigan yet. But this pushes me one step closer.

Fuckers.

Once again, I'm proud of my city. Ann Arbor officially opposes two bills designed to eliminate domestic-partnership benefits in Michigan.

One of the Republican excuses for this crap is that it's a matter of fiscal responsibility. This one is always, always bullshit: A gay couple and a lesbian couple are four people, two male and two female, but they're eligible if they're paired off one way and not eligible if they're paired off another.

I realize that there are a whole bunch of Repubs 'n' such out there terrified by Teh Icky Gay, but... never mind the societal advantages to increasing the number of married couples; never mind the emotional advantages to our fellow humans that arise from being able to share their lives together openly and proudly. I see we have to work as Repubs do, and appeal to their cheap fear.

I can do that.

Repubs, and others who are freaked out in case Takei gets on you: If they're married to each other, they're off the market. Two less who can Takei you up. So, quick, make it more advantageous and easier for them to get married, before they suddenly realize how very sexually attractive you are, and they leap out from such bush and touch you, rendering you helpless and pliant, whimpering all the while as they do whatever it is that they do, you're not sure but it's related to sex and will probably addict you*, MY GOD WE'VE GOT TO MARRY THEM ALL OFF!

* Always weirds me out that the people who hate and fear Takei so much also seem so convinced that it's so good that it'll destroy your previous notions of sexuality.

I am laughing my ass off over here, over this IGN video showing the motion capture performer for Harley Quinn in the upcoming Batman: Arkham City video game. And the comments on the YouTube page.

Any good, funny vid you've seen lately? Link 'em up.